As many of you may have picked up on in a previous post, we are pregnant!!!! We have wanted this for a very long time and are soooo excited to finally be announcing this!! I am 21 weeks along and it is another girl!!!! The girls are sooo excited and talk about the baby all of the time. They can't wait until around Christmas time when the baby will come!!!
I have been keeping a little journal throughout our trying to get pregnant process and thought that I would share it. It is not something that I would normally do, but I had a cousin who did this same thing and posted it in the middle of my trying efforts and it helped me, so I think that this is just something that I need to do.
Jan. 18, 2011
Trying to get pregnant this time has been particularly hard. With Macie, I got pregnant right away. It was kind of a shocking experience to be honest, because we thought that it at least would take a few months. With Addie I got pregnant within 2 months of trying. With this one, it has taken us about 14 months. Which I realize is not a long time for some people, but for us, it was a very long time and a great learning experience.
Ever since I had Addie my body has not been normal. My periods come whenever they decide to and my weight has been crazy. About a year after I had Addie, I lost about 15 lbs. for no reason. We could not figure out why. I couldn't gain weight even though I was trying. I was eating all of the time and alot. I finally went to the Dr. about it and he ran some blood tests to find nothing wrong. So, I went about my life and started working out again and all of sudden I slowly started to gain weight and thought that maybe the possibility of becoming pregnant would be a little easier now that I was a normal weight (for me). But, alas, still no sign of pregnancy. There were at least 3 months where we were for sure that I was pregnant because my period was missed, but then it would show up at about week 6 or 7. Really disappointing. There were a lot of tears shed, especially during those months where I feel like I was teased with false hope. (With the first 2, a positive pregnancy test didn't show until I was 7 weeks along. So I really did think that I was prego a few times.) Even Geoff said one of the times that we thought I was prego and we weren't, "oh, how sad, I was getting so excited at the thought of another one."
I finally went to the Dr. after trying for 7 months and not getting pregnant. He put me on Clomid.
Macie asks all of time when we are going to have another baby. She has been asking on a daily basis for about 6 months now. To the point that she says: "mom, if I am a good girl, can we have another baby?" Sad.
Addie has been going around telling people that there is a baby in my tummy. Only for me to quickly turn around and assure whomever she told, that I was not pregnant.
March 2, 2011
Today I found out that I am pregnant!!! I am so excited!! I had tears in my eyes when I read the test! I just can't believe that I am actually pregnant. This is something that we have wanted for so long, that it almost seems surreal. I am 6 1/2 weeks along. I was on clomid with this one, so now I am just hoping that it is not twins!! haha!
The due date is October 31.
March 8, 2011
Miscarriage. Just a simple word until you live through it. Yesterday afternoon I started cramping a little bit. Not enough to make me think anything, just enough to make me notice. Then I started bleeding. Alot. I knew that it was not good. The cramping became so painful. I told Geoff that I thought that it was truly unfair to make me go through the physical pain of it when I am already having to deal with the emotional pain of it. Not fair. I was curled up in fetal position half of the night. (warning: if you don't like details, stop here)
At about 4 am I went to the bathroom, there was my little baby in the toilet. I wanted to pick it up and hold it, to say goodbye. It felt so wrong to just flush it down without even a second thought. I went to bed and cried. Saying goodbye to something you have longed for for so long is a very hard thing to do. I wanted that baby so bad. I wanted to get big and pregnant, to feel it move inside me, to see if we were going to be having a boy or girl, to tell the girls that they were finally getting a sibling!!! It would have been so fun.
I know that this happened for a reason and that it is a good thing. I just can't believe that I am going through this. That this is happening to me, to us. It is things like this that make you cherish every second that you have with your family and make you realize how truly blessed you are.
May 24, 2011
Today we got another positive test. I am so excited again, but don't want to think about it to much or get my hopes up. We just are hoping that this one is going to last and that this time we will be blessed with a little sweet baby in the end.
June 7, 2011
Went to the Dr. today. He said that the baby looks good and healthy this time with nothing wrong. I am 8 weeks along. He drew my blood today as well and told me that everything looked good and normal. He also told me that it looks like there is only 1 baby. (I was worried that it could be twins because I was on clomid again.) The due date is January 8, 2012.
July 18, 2011
We told the girls tonight that they are going to be big sisters. That we are having another baby!!! They were a little confused and then excited and then I think they forgot about it because we didn't mention it again! (We are going to Idaho tomorrow and told them not to tell anyone because we want to surprise them.)
July 21, 2011
I went and had an ultrasound done today by my friend here is Pocatello. I am 16 weeks along, so we were hoping that we would be able to tell what it is. We got a pretty good look and are pretty sure that it is another girl!!! So exciting. I think that it is just what we thought and kind of what we were expecting.
August 3, 2011
We just got from Idaho. Told the family that we were expecting!! They were all sooo excited! I had the girls go downstairs in pj's that said big sister on them. The reaction was great!! This is the first time that I have announced to them in person that I am expecting. So fun!
We basically can't wait for this little baby to come into our home. We are ALL sooooo ExciTed!!
The due date for this little girl is Jan. 8, 2012 and we can't wait to meet her!!!
a little glimpse into our crazy life!
11 comments:
Congrats! Glad someone out there is having girls!
So happy for you guys Becky! I can COMPLETELY relate to your trial.. we were so excited when we were supposed to have a baby on October 31st also (now that's a little crazy, same due date as you had) and I miscarried at 12 weeks. Just yesterday I started crying at SUBWAY because I so wish I wouldn't have lost my baby. So glad things have gone better with this pregnancy for you, congrats on another sweet girl!
Congratulations Becky! I'm so excited for you guys!!
Getting pregnant is hard! It took us a long time to get our girls. I can very much relate the the sadness and heartache that come when you want something so badly. Thanks for sharing your story.
Mckinlay's birthday is Januray 8th! So if you ask me, baby girl #3 is off to a good start. :)
Congrats on a third little sweetheart! And thanks for sharing your hard things with us, especially your difficult miscarriage. We also kept hoping for pregnancy when I was simply late. Finally we quit trying, and then I got pregnant with Enoch. Totally cliche, right? ;)
Becky--Thanks for sharing your story. I am so happy for you and your family and this new little baby girl. I love your description of how wonderful it feels to be big and pregnant and to feel life moving around. I don't care what anyone says--it is a glorious thing to be a woman and to have the opportunity to experience pregnancy.
oh Becky I had no idea. I am so sorry you had to go through all of that. What a hard time in your life. I can't say I know exactly how you feel as I have never had a problem getting pregnant But I did have a miscarriage. So I know just how devastating that can be. I had one right before I got pregnant with Julia. Greg was about to leave for Iraq and same thing as you I started to bleed and yes lost the baby. I was so upset. I had lost that sweet baby and then felt so angry because Greg was leaving in a few weeks and I would have to wait a whole year for the chance to start trying again. But by the grace of God I got pregnant 2 weeks after my miscarriage. I was shocked and so was my doctor. Getting pregnant that fast after a miscarriage is almost unheard of and a little dangerous. But I knew it was meant to be. It's hard to always have faith that everything will work out in the end but now you are pregnant with another beautiful baby girl! I am so excited for you and I wish you and your family all the best.
Oh Becky I am so sorry you have had to go through all this. Its so hard to want something so bad and to not be able to do anything about it. I know those ups and downs and it sucks. I almost cried when you talked about your miscarriage I am so sorry you had to go through that. Glad all is well with this little girl and so excited for this new addition to come to your family.
Congrats you guys! Sorry for your previous loss and struggles. We've been there ourselves. It is hard, but looking back I'm grateful for the experience. Wishing you guys the best of luck!
Becky thanks for sharing this. and congrats on getting another little girl! what lucky little girls the they are to have you and jeff and to be able to grow close with each other as three sisters! :)And you get to do fun little girl outtings with them! that sounds so fun! :)
I am so excited for you guys! 3 cute Barnum girls will be so much fun. It looks like you are having lots of fun in Texas too.
Becky, Congrats!! Just spent some time catching up on your blog. It was good to read your story. We are currently on month 12 of trying and so far, no luck. You really gave me hope. There are times that I have thought, what if we can only have two kids? Sometimes we don't know why things happen the way they do, but hopefully in due time it will all work out. I am so happy for you!! You will LOVE having a boy. They are so fun!! Congrats!
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